Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Backward...Not Forward

You know how we're always told to never look behind us?  The future is all that matters.  Good advice most of the time...if you're a person who dwells too much on the past.  I am all about looking forward most of the time. 
But...
I got a call today from my old boss, offering me my old job back...that I left only because of going on maternity leave.  I chose not to go back mainly because child care is so expensive that it really would not have been worthwhile for me to return, plus with the downturn in the economy, I knew they would be better off if I didn't return. 
Now, I do part-time contract work that really has a lot of benefits to it.  My hours are VERY flexible.  If I can't go in one for some reason, it's ok, I can go another day or work from home.  The company was flexible enough that I was able to start working mostly in the evening so that I didn't have to cart the little one with me and could leave her home with her Dad.  It's been working great.
There are benefits also to go back to a full-time job though.  Paid vacation, EI benefits if I have to go on maternity leave again, sick days, higher income to report toward buying a house...but is it enough?
My gut tells me that I have shut the door on that part of my life.  That there is no need to look back cause it's working out pretty good the way it is right now.  I get to be a part-time stay-at-home mom, which is better than being a full-time working mom any day.  I am in an environment that keeps me inspired to write.  Around like-minded people.  A more relaxed, casual atmosphere...no pressure...I work on my own, no one looking over my shoulder to ensure I am getting the work done, my performance speaks volumes and I am acknowledged for the efforts (most of the time).
I suppose I have answered my own question just by spilling the words from my fingertips.

2 comments:

  1. I'd have to say to weigh your pros and cons in the situation. Look long term as far as finances and what not and see if you'll really benefit from going back.

    I do know that looking at the prospect of being a full time working mom, I'm kind of disappointed..and wish I could have that time with my child in the future...so I don't know...I'm a little biased too...

    ReplyDelete
  2. I hated being home. I loved being there when Dylan was a baby, but I worked 3 part time jobs...

    Going back to work full-time made me feel, ME again. Like I was back in control of my life. I had the power, I made the rules, even if I was working for someone else.

    I used a childcare place that was sliding scale based on my income, I used whatever government aid a single mom could use, but dammnit I know my son respects me working my booty off to give him a kickass life, and even though I struggle every single day, he has no friggan idea.

    Ahh the joys of motherhood.

    ReplyDelete

Send me some love...and I will send some back!