I think I am obsessed with the vaccuum cleaner.  Well today at least.  I just can't seem to get the carpet clean enough and then when I think I am just about there, Julianne drops some crumbs on the floor and I have to turn around and do it again.  It could have something to do with the new vaccuum cleaner we bought just before Christmas.  I am SOOOO happy with it.  We have short carpets on our floors and no matter how low I adjusted our old vaccuum I just couldn't get it to pick up much of anything.  The new one is from heaven, I am sure of it.  It picks up EVERYTHING.  And I mean everything.  No problems trying to suck up my slippers, Julianne's toys, the cord if I happen to run over it.  It is a SUPER sucker and it is my new best friend.

I could never be a hoarder.  I watch the program on A&E every Monday evening and I just want to climb through the television and give these people a shake and clean  up their house.  (Well there are some you couldn't pay me enough to get anywhere near) but the 'not so bad' ones I just want to clean.  How can anyone have that much STUFF?  I would go crazy.  I am already mildly claustrophobic, that much STUFF in my apartment I would lose it.  But I do understand it's a form of OCD and not as easy to overcome as it would seem, but the point is, that is not me.  Not even frickin' close.

When I was in my early 20's I dated this guy for quite a long time, we had moved in together but after a few months moved into his parent's home.  His mom had a roommate and by all outward appearances upon first walking into the home you would never think there was a problem.  But then you go to the basement and OMG.  A path had to be made to get anywhere.  The laundry room, the basement door, the wood stove.  It was ridiculous.  I wouldn't have classified her as a hoarder so much as a chronically disorganized person.  The only other rooms that suffered as much as the basement were her bedroom and the kitchen.  The kitchen was so bad that you wouldn't have wanted to cook in there.  Any time you did, it had to be thoroughly cleaned first.  I think that's why today I have a phobia of messy kitchens. 

I am not a neat freak, not even close, but I am pretty organized and tidy.  I like a lived in look, not a sterile look, and not a garbage dump look.  I think it's safe to say I fall into the middle somewhere.  I hate housework like anyone else, but some days get a little obsessed.

Today is one of those days. 

Not much beats a quiet evening in the living room, laptop strategically perched, rhythmically tapping out the next genius blog and savouring the aroma of a nice mug of hot chocolate, reveling in the warmth as it drizzles down your throat.  In the background Roberto Luongo and his Vancouver Canucks are giving Sydney Crosby and the Pittsburg Penguins a royal ass-whooping.  Really...nothing could be better.

But it's on these quiet evenings, even with the distraction of a fabulous hockey game, that I tend to sit and think about some of the things that really chaffe my ass.  Like tight underwear, riding up where they don't belong.  I think about things that are just plain unfair and even though they are things of the past, sometimes they find their way back to the forefront of my thoughts.  Usually there is a trigger.  A conversation with someone, something seen on TV or in the news or on the internet.

This time it was based on a conversation.  One that I tried to dismiss but nevertheless it remains with me.

When we are children we dream of that big fancy wedding, having a nice house with a house full of children.  You imagine the day that you finally find out you are pregnant, because it's what you wanted, maybe a little sooner than expected or planned, but wanted nonetheless.  You are so full of excitement, anticipation, fear of the unknown and you just want to share that with your friends and family.  So you start the task of telling all the people you are close to, that matter to you, waiting for them to share in your joy, expecting them to be happy for you.  And most of them are.  Most of them are thrilled for you, excited, supportive.  But then there comes the one that just can't say anything good.  The one that you would have expected to be the happiest, the one that is supposed to be more supportive than anyone else.  But nothing good comes from that person's mouth.  Not even the slightest joy in the moment, no congratulations, nothing.  Instead, through harsh words you are brought to tears in an already stressful and unknown situation and they show none of the support that should have been there.  It takes months for this person to finally come around, essentially not happening until the birth of that precious little bundle.  I can never tell my daughter that initially this person never wanted her to be born.  Someone that she should grow extremely close to in the coming years.

And then...to make matters worse, the talk of there potentially being another one at some point in the future, brings about almost the same reaction.  Although I ask for there not to be a reaction like that, I am told that if I don't want a reaction like that, then I will probably get complete silence as this person tries to bite their tongue.  Is this fair?  I say no.  And it hurts more than you can imagine...even after proving that it has been fine so far with the first one, I am threatened with the same reaction if it were to happen again.  If it's a threat to try and make me change my mind, it's not going to work.  It saddens and angers me all at the same time.

It brings up the idea of never telling this person until I have to.  Like the day I give birth.  That's certainly not how it's supposed to be.  I  know there will be plenty of other people that will be more than happy for us when the time comes and it will come.  Because I make my own decisions, along with my husband, on what is best for us and what we want.  Not what one person thinks we should or shouldn't do. 

It's amazing though how even though you have hundreds of people that are purely elated and share in your joy, just one person can deflate your mood in an instant.  You can't really blame someone for not wanting to go there again.  Maybe if it was negativity from someone not so important it wouldn't hurt so much, you would just brush it off and say whatever and carry on. But that is not a luxury I have. 

I know this person will read this post...and I just hope that maybe something will sink in a little about how much this hurts, even though I have said it before and it seems to have gone ignored.

A few things have transpired the last couple of days that I am just now getting the chance to write about. 

Julianne peed in her potty the other day.  Granted it was completely by accident, after me quickly putting her there when she started to pee on the floor, but the point is she actually got some where it was supposed to go.  And she was so pleased with herself.  Precious little girl!

Second...it looks like a trip to Holland is in the cards this year after all.  Hubby just got a promotion at work that came with a HUGE raise.  Totally not what either of us was expecting.  After a year of no raises at work due to the recession that has hit EVERYWHERE we knew one was coming...but not when nor how much.  But much to our surprise it was earlier than anticipated and grander than we could have imagined.  So we are planning a trip so that Julianne's Oma can actually see her granddaughter in the flesh for the first time.  And other relatives too.

I hate planning trips.  So much to take care of before we can go anywhere.  I need a new passport and Julianne NEEDS a passport.  So that will be the first thing we take care of.  Then to actually figure out when would be a good time to go.  The cheapest flight we have found so far is in May.  A little sooner than I would have liked but we'll see how it pans out.  Seems it's MUCH cheaper if we go before Juliannne turns 2.  Otherwise we have to pay for a seat for her and although it's not full  price it's still pretty damn expensive.

But life is good and all things will work out the way they are supposed to.

The Lovely Bones

I love movies and I don't get to see as many of them as I would like.  Going to a movie theatre to see the next great blockbuster is not cheap entertainment anymore.  My husband is not a movie person so renting them isn't much of an option either cause he usually falls asleep and the movies that I would actually like to see are not on Video On Demand when I want them to be.

So thanks to some wonderful colleagues I was given passes to see an advanced screening of The Lovely Bones.  Directed by Peter Jackson of Lord of the Rings fame and starring Mark Wahlberg, Rachel Weisz, Susan Sarandon and a relatively large cast of rising stars, unknowns to me, but maybe well known to others.

The movie is based on the novel of the same name by Alice Sebold and is told from the point of view of Suzie Salmon, murdered at 14 years old by a neighborhood pedophile.  Suzie is in an "in between place" between heaven and earth and watches while her father searches desperately for her murderer, her family falls apart, friends come together...all because of her.

While the movie started off strong and left the viewer with the belief that you were about to witness something great...it faltered part way through.  The desperation of a grief stricken father lacked conviction and determination, the outcome did not live up to the expectations of the beginning and the middle...to put it bluntly...was just wierd.  While some of the graphics and special effects used to create the "in between" were absolutely stunning, there were a lot of areas that were just completely pointless and added nothing to the story. 

I found myself very disappointed that there was not more interaction with Suzie post-mortem and her family.  I am a huge believer in ghosts and the supernatural so if somehow she had been more involved in helping her family find her killer, I would have believed it and enjoyed it far more.

And the ending, was just unsatisfying. 

I am not a movie critic...this is just my opinion...but if I were to rate this movie on a scale of 1-5, it gets a 3.

With that said, I will probably watch it again when it's on video but my next task is going to be to read the book.  I have the feeling that I will be much more satisfied with how it was intended. 

View Trailer

Verbiage

Every night I am always thinking ahead to what I am going to blog about the next day.  Sometimes I get a great idea and then by morning I have either forgotten about it or something else comes up that seems more interesting.  Last night, as I got into the bath to finally take care of my other feminine hygiene obligations, to mow the forest where my legs should have been, I was thinking about how easy life was when we were children, no responsibilites except to decide what toy to play with the next day.  We were taken care of by our parents, didn't have to worry how we were going to pay the rent or where the next meal was going to come from.  Before we cared what other people thought of us and the despair of not 'fitting in'.

And then...I wake this morning and with cup of coffee in hand sit down to read new posts by the bloggers that I follow.  Much to my surprise, and delight, Apryl at So F*cking Fabulous I Piss Glitter said almost what I was thinking in what was probably a much more creative way than I could have come up with.  Even though she said I could still write about it too, I am gonna let her have this one. ;)

But now, I am left with trying to figure out something creative and interesting to blog about.  So much pressure!  I can feel you just waiting in anticipation of what next great piece of verbiage I am going to come up with. 

I could write about my daughter and how much she loves to brush her own teeth.  She gets mad if we try to do it for her but we know at 16 months she is most definitely not doing it properly.  Oh she has the front brushing down pat, but doesn't get the back ones or behind very well. 

Or I could write about the fact that all I can smell right now is poop and I don't know where it's coming from.  There are no dirty diapers sitting out, at least not that I can see...and I am pretty sure I washed my hands...so where the heck is it coming from?  Not on the bottom of my shoes, not on my clothes.  And I did shower this morning.  I frickin' hate mystery smells. 

The temper tantrum princess is having some quiet time in her bedroom right now, but it's not so quiet.  She is moaning and whining, little bursts of frustration waft from her bedroom...and I will not give in.  I am on to her little games and God-willing, will put a stop to it early.  It's probably just wishful thinking, but a girl can dream can't she?

So see, I just don't have much to write about now.  You could just mosey on over to Apryl's blog and have a boo at what I was essentially thinking...but was too slow to the punch. 

Great minds think alike!!!!!!

Enjoy your day!

Not So Smelly Anymore

There is a God!

A God of showers and smelly freshness.

You might recall my post of December 14th and not being able to shower the way I wanted to.  I finally got to the point that I just couldn't take the constant sweaty, stinky odor that was me any longer.  So thanks to some advice and research, I always do research...see how others have handled the same situation cause I know (or hope) I am not alone.  The internet really does have an answer for everything. 

Well, the solution that seems to have worked for me is to take my daughter into the shower with me.  As it turns out, she actually likes it.  Likes it a lot.  It's funny though, she has this major aversion to getting water on her head and down her face, yet she is obsessed with standing under the stream of water as it runs off my boobs. 

So, I am finally able to shower daily, and usually just shortly after waking up, and she gets a bathing too. But when one thing works out for the better, there is always something else that suffers.  I now have a forest growing on my legs.  I have not been able to find the time to take care of some of the other feminine hygiene routines.  I would normally do this when I shower but now that's not possible unless I want a little shaving cream covered toddler. 

And now, that I am sitting here writing about it, I realize I could just go do it right now.

Dearest Spammer,

I DO NOT wish to have my penis enlarged.  I am quite satisfied with what I have been given but if that ever changes, although I am quite certain I will NOT call it Peter the Great, if I find myself suffering from erectile disfunction I know you are there to provide me with all the Viagra I may ever need.  Even herbal varieties...who would have known. 
I am not sure which married couple needs or wants to make their 'rocket' work every night, I know I don't have time for that shit...and I really think if anyone needs their tool repaired they should be seeking the assistance of a professional.  But it relieves me to know that when I have overdosed on Viagra or Cialis and find myself with an erection lasting more than 4 hours, the pain unbearable, I can turn to you and know that Vicodin is within my reach.  Cut out the middle man as you say and order my drugs online, delivered right to my door.  Something tells me that I should keep the middle man, have the drugs actually prescribed because I fail to see an offering for NA. Surely after purchasing highly addictive drugs online I will need their support. 

I won't even miss a meeting because I know I can get replica watches whenever I need them.  The perfect fake watch.  Sounds like an oxymoron but at least I would look stylish in my fake Rolex without ever having to venture downtown to find one.

I can simply sit at home listening to my IPOD, blogging on my laptop, watching TV, taking pictures of my family with all the products I have received from China that you so graciously offered me.

I can ride in style to my meetings on the new motorcycle (also from China) and never get lost because I have that fancy GPS attached to the bike.

All in all, I want to thank you for making my life so much more pleasurable and easy.  I can now just sit at home and get fatter, waiting for the newest weight loss gimic to be offered to me because I know you have it.  I know I will see it soon.

BTW-I am still waiting for that inheritance from my long lost relative.

Sincerely,
Me

What Gives You The Right?

“Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you (Matthew 7:12).”

What many people don't know about me is that I can be a pretty nosy person.  Not to the point that I work my way into other people's business uninvited, but rather to the degree that if I want to know something about someone I will flat out ask, even if it's of a personal nature because I have learned that people love to talk about themselve and will share just about anything if asked.  If they don't want to share that information that's fine too, they will say so and I respect that.

But on the same note, I sometimes won't be that forthright.  Instead I might lurk (bloggosphere term) and see what all the hype is about before saying anything, if I say anything at all, because sometimes I know when to keep my big mouth shut.  And sometimes I don't.  Sometimes my mouth runs away with me and words are out before I have really given it a lot of thought.  Thankfully when you're blogging you have the luxury of being able to rethink what you're saying as you type it and the delete button is just inches away so you can take it back before you actually hit the post button.

At the same time, I would like to point out that I am not a religious person, but I am not unfamiliar with the bible either.  The quote above is just something came to mind after reading some recent posts.

I am a huge advocate for freedom of speech and the right to have opinions.  But what gives any person the right to judge another just because they don't happen to have the same opinion or feel as strongly about something?

In my recent 'lurkiness' I came across a site that has been ridiculed and labeled for voicing their opinions on certain issues.  Granted after reading some of it, the author is very aggressive in her opinions and her commentors/supporters are really not much better.  They are quick to judge and bad mouth others because their opinions are simply not what they believe.

The most recent post was the issue of euthanizing an animal/beloved pet, for the wrong reasons.  Or what they believed to be the wrong reasons.  Attacking others at the same time because they didn't feel quite the way they did.  We will be on the verge of becoming a communist nation the day we only allow one person's opinion to matter.

I am not a supporter of euthanizing an animal just because you discover you can't take care of it after the fact or that the animal doesn't fit into your lifestyle any longer.  There are definitely other ways to handle it.  Finding a new home for the animal, a place that will love and take care of that animal just the way that you wanted to initially but found that it was not possible.  But there is a fine line when your animal becomes ill.  Do you spend the money to try and make the pet better or do you ease its suffering and have it euthanized?

I want to share a little story.

I grew up in a home with a lot of pets over time.  But my father was of the opinion that if the pet did not fit into our life any more or we couldn't take it with us where ever we were going, he would have it put down without even trying to find it a new home.  I hated this, but was too young to really have a voice.  But I did vow that any pet I had in the future would be treated with the same respect as any other member of the family. 

When I was 17 and had gone to live with my mom and step dad, we got a kitten.  The most adorable little orange and white kitty, and so well behaved.  The four kids loved that kitty, did everything for him and vowed to always take care of him.  One day, while sitting in the living room, I witnessed the kitty have a seizure.  It was one of the scariest things I have ever seen and I actually thought he was dead.  But when the seizure stopped we discovered he was not dead but was now paralyzed.  A parapalegic.  Everything below his front legs did not work any more.  I freaked, I cried and I begged my step dad to take him to the vet.  But he wouldn't do it.  Being the stubborn teen that I was, I wrapped the kitty up in a blanket, went to the neighbour and asked for a ride to the vet.  The vet examined him and determined that there was nothing that could be done for him and euthanization was recommended.  I didn't want to do that, but it didn't seem right to let the cat suffer either.  I phoned my step dad, who was a little less than pleased that I had gone against him but he came and got me and paid the vet bill.  But he refused to have the cat put down mainly because he didn't want to pay for it but I also think he didn't believe in euthanization either.  We argued but I let him win that one because I guess I wanted to believe that we could still take care of this poor cat.
Over the coming weeks, the cat would move along the carpet, dragging his back legs to the point that the hair and skin on his legs became raw.  We cleaned him and bandaged on a regular basis.  But he didn't have any control over his bodily functions either.  It was stressful and more inhumane than I could have imagined.  It just didn't seem right. 

One day the cat got outside as this was the life he was used to.  And disappeared.  We searched and searched to no avail.  Really he couldn't have gotten very far but we could not find him.  Days later, I returned from school and my mom informed me they had found the cat.  It appeared that somehow he had tried to get down the patio stairs and had fallen through the stairs, landing in a bucket underneath.  Because he had no function in his hind region he was unable to get out of the bucket.  And then it rained.

I never forgave myself for allowing that to happen.  If we had done what the vet recommended, if I had been stronger and stuck to my guns, he would have gone quietly, no suffering, no pain.

Today I have a cat.  A beautiful, 9 year old, white ball of laziness.  But she is my ball of laziness.  And yes I consider her part of the family but she does have behavior issues.  If she feels neglected or her litter box is not cleaned daily ( I think she believes she is a princess) she will retaliate by peeing on clothes that might have been left on the floor or peeing on the furniture.  Both annoying and stinky.  I had no problem cleaning up after her, resorting to being her lowly servant in order to make her happy...but when my daughter was born it became a different concern.  A health concern.  I still struggle with this today.  My husband wants me to find a new home for her, I don't want to let her go because to me she is part of the family, bad behavior and all...but that does not give me the right to judge other people because they don't feel the same way. 

She has behavior issues so trying to find her another home would be almost impossible, taking her to a shelter she would end up being put down anyway if she wasn't adopted and at her age the chances are unlikely.  With such an over population of abandoned and abused animals, she would just be another casualty.

I think these people that are so quick to judge others who are trying to do the right thing, should save their judgements for the people that abuse their pets.

No one is perfect.  We make decisions based on what is right for us.  If you don't believe in something then don't do it, but don't judge others because they don't feel the same way you do.

Whose Way Is Better?

We have more influence on our child's future than we may realize.  Even just the small things, no matter how insignificant they may seem at the time, can completely alter the course of their lives, contribute to the choices they make.

Parenting styles vary from parent to parent.  Is one any better than the other?

One parent weans their toddler off the bottle at a year as recommended by pediatricians, eliminate the pacifier soon thereafter, start with the potty training under two years old and make the change to a toddler or big kid bed by two years of age.

Another parent makes the switch from bottle to only solid food before the end of the first year, eliminate the pacifier around the same time or sooner, start potty training as early as possible and moves their child to a big bed the first time they fall or climb out of their cribs.

A third possibility yet...a parent doesn't put any limits on the child, just lets them keep the bottle as long as they want, still using it at almost 3 years old.  If the bottle is still there, then the pacifier is there too.  Keep them in the crib until they just can't fit anymore or is too heavy and doesn't even begin potty training until 3 years of age.

How different do you think these children will be?  Are any one of these styles better than another?  Will these methods have a particular impact on the child later?

I welcome your comments.

All The Things I Wanted To Do Before 30 But Was Afraid To Try

I can honestly say I have had no regrets in my life.  I firmly believe that everything I did, be it good or bad, mistakes and choices, has made me the person I am today and without those circumstances that many could do without, I would not be the person I am today.  Of course not all has been good.  I have had struggles and those struggles continue today.  But it gives you something to work towards.  A better life, learning to make better choices.  And I have no one to blame or congratulate but myself.

With that said, there should always be a desire, a drive, to do more.  Push yourself out of that comfort zone to truly discover what you are made of.  To that end I have now compiled a list of All The Things I Wanted To Do Before 30 But Was Afraid To Try.  Because I am now in my mid-30's I will have to be content with now trying to complete these things before I turn 40. 

In the making of this list I have discovered there are some new items.  Things I didn't consider wanting to do before 30 but now would like to do before 40, so they too have made the list.

1. View an autopsy. 
Now this could be considered morbid by some but it is something I have always wanted to do.  Being a writer and sometimes writing about some dark topics, I always thought it was only common place to want to see how this is really done.

2. Write a novel.
I see this on most people's lists but that is not why it is on mine.  This is something I have always wanted to do and have started many times but to date has remained unfinished for whatever reason.  Through the help of a year long novel course I am taking starting on January 18th I hope to have this accomplished by the end of the year.  First draft at least.

3. Quit smoking.
Ha...well...if you click over to my blog Out of the Smoky Haze you will find that I already started this attempt last year and am documenting all my successes, failures and smoking related stories.

4. Be financially self-sufficient & debt free.
Something I have been striving to do for so long but it just has not happened yet.  It took me a long time to learn the importance behind this and now that I have I am making every effort to make it happen before it's too late.

5. Have another baby...maybe even two. NEW
Before 30 I couldn't even imagine having had one, but now that I have, I would like to have another.  (I can almost hear the phone ringing already, "Hi Mom." 
What many people don't know about me is that I have this absurd fascination with odd numbers.  It seems unbalanced to me to have two children, it has to be three or remain at one.  Or maybe it's the fact that even numbers are too balanced that I need a little tilt.  Now this may not happen because I am not the only person in this decision, so I will probably have to find some way to feel balanced with two.

6. Lose the extra body fat.
A common goal of most women but a goal nonetheless.  I have struggled with my weight most of my life.  It's time to really start doing something about it.

7. Drive across Canada, stopping in every province along the way.
In my almost 35 years on this planet, I still have not seen what else this country has to offer.  Sure I've seen pictures but it's not the same as being able to view it first hand.  I have been to parts of the US, I have been to Europe, but when it comes to Canada, I have only set foot in British Columbia and Alberta.  I know the country is huge and most people haven't seen much more than their own backyard, but I don't want to leave this planet without seeing the rest of the beauty that makes up Canada.  Many have a desire to travel the world, I just want to travel the country.

8. Learn to speak dutch, fluently. NEW
My husband is dutch, straight from the land of windmills and tulips.  His parents are dutch and speak very little english so every time they come to visit, or we go there, I cannot communicate with them any more than a few words I have picked up over the last few years or by sign language.  If anything were ever to happen to my husband I could not talk to his parents over the phone.  On the other hand, he does have two brothers and they both speak english very well, but it would be nice to be able to remove the middle men.

9. Write one short story a month for one year and submit to literary journals. NEW
I have been slacking on my writing over the past few years so I really want to try and commit to writing and submitting at least one short story a month, for 12 months.

10. Take a poetry class. NEW
I have written very little poetry in my life.  I never seemed to get it.  But recently I have this urge to try something different and see where it takes me.  I have started to appreciate this literary form a little more so now would like to actually give it more of an effort and try for myself.
It's finally happening.  It's actually kind of liberating to step out of your comfort zone every now and again.  Even though I just started, I am crossing this off because I am certain I will complete this.  Will be interesting to see if I really have it in me.

Joining the Land of "The List"

Before I get into the real topic of this post this morning, I just want to say thanks to all the people that offered some positive words based on my post of yesterday.  I will point out, the day did not get any better until late into the evening when said crazy daughter curled up in mommy's arms and snuggled until she was ready to go to bed.  All the stresses of the day just melted away and I was reminded what this is all for.  Why we choose to have children and what a great privilage it is to be allowed to raise and mold a child to adulthood. 
I really have to thank one of my loyal readers (you know who you are, Mom :) ) for this link to tips on disciplining a toddler. in a positive way. Don't get me wrong, I have been a great advocate for offering praise when she does something good or accomplishes something and even when she listens when we tell her no, but my consistancy lacks.

I awoke this morning determined to be patient and to try being a positive role model to my child.  So, as much as I hate to admit it, sometimes moms do have great advice. 

Now in other news...the last couple of days I have spent a lot of time searching and reading other people's blogs.  Some through links from other blog sites that I already follow and some just by hitting NEXT BLOG, found at the top of my screen.  I happened across a blog awhile back, Confessions of a Twenty Something Year Old and even though I am beyond the 20 somethings I find it interesting to read how current 20 somethings view life and what has changed if anything since I was there.  So, upon following this blog for the past week, I was directed to another blog that has really struck my interest.  Reinventing Sandy B  The common thread is The List.  Cheryl from Confessions of a Twenty Something Year Old guest posted on Reinventing Sandy B with a list of all the things she wants to accomplish before she turns 30 and Sandy's whole purpose of her blog is to account for the things she wants to do before she turns 30.  (Plus so much more.  Very good read.  I suggest you check it out.) 

So, enters 'the list'.

Now many of you will say, "But Robin, it's too late to have a list of all the things you want to accomplish before you turn 30".  And yes you would be right.  I am already half way into my 30's so I thought of a different list. 

All the Things I Wanted to Do Before 30 but Was Too Afraid to Try...So Now Before 40.

I still have to iron out some details and get all my thoughts in order, so I will compile and post this so called list soon.  I just wanted to give you a heads up and maybe you want to compile your own list.  No matter how old you are, you're never too old to have a list.

Not Enough Coffee In the World...

Julianne is screaming and crying at 8 in the morning.  My sleep deprived body is saying, "Noooooo, not yet."  I straggle to the kitchen, grab her a cup of milk, thrust it into her little hands, and toddle on back to bed, hoping beyond all hope that she will just go back to sleep.
"Yesss...thank you."  I awake again, still not sure if the body is ready to function, feeling sure that only a few minutes has passed.  Much to my surprise, according to the evil that is the alarm clock, it is almost 11:30.  WTF?  Can that much time really have passed? 
Julianne is still in her bed, quiet for the most part but as I listen I can tell she is awake.  I drag myself out of bed and enter her room...to find her...oh for god's sake...completly declothed.  Yep, naked.  She has removed everything.  Sleeper and diaper.  And she is just smiling.  In my sleepy haze I find the discarded diaper, by stepping on it, yep, thank you very much.  Thank god there was no number 2 or this post would have a completely different tone, let me tell you.
Sooo, we get a fresh diaper on her and get her back in some clothes, but not without a lot of resistance.  Fussing, moaning, rolling around, doing everything in her little power to squirm away from me, to avoid the confines of being clothed.  But, mommy succeeds again, after all, even though I am still half asleep, I am stronger...not much mind you, not at this point anyway.
She runs off to the living room, I know she is in search of the next thing she can get her little hands on and it takes no time at all for her to find the object of her desire.  My laptop.  Which in my drunkenesque-like state from the night before, forgot to put away.  Leaving it in the most easily accessible spot for her to get her hands on. And get her hands on it she does.  Unplugs the mouse, and with a phlumph it falls to the floor. 
In that haze between grogginess and fully awake I try to form an action plan in my head.  Try to prioritize what needs to be done in a short time.  This proves to be more difficult than I imagined.  She needs breakfast, I NEED coffee, I need to get my laptop away from her, I need to get her something to drink, I need, I need, I need...for her to stop touching everything.  The TV, the stereo, the computer, climbing the back of the chair until she is ready to go ass over tea kettle, head first on to the floor.  The only thing she is not doing is climbing the f'ing walls.  And I am sure if she could she would.  It's been barely 10 minutes and I am exhausted.  
Ok, Robin, take a deep breath and think.  Coffee...yep, the coffee is coming first.  The laptop is on the floor and it's closed so she can't open it anyway, she is off the chair and trying to turn on the TV, something she does all the time anyway, so my coffee comes first.  Then I will get her food.  Sometimes we have to put ourselves first even if it's only with the slightest action.
Alright, she is eating, I have coffee, I am trying to read recently updated blogs and check my email.  She hits the power button and the computer slowly begins to shut down.  I want to scream, I want to throw the computer against the wall, but I take another deep breath, let the computer come back on, and try not to throw glare darts at my daughter, although they would completely miss her anyway.
I am on to my third cup of coffee this morning as I write this and she has removed everything from the front closet, brought out almost all of her toys, ran her car into the Christmas tree and then tried to give the tree a hug (thank god that thing is coming down today, screw epiphany), opened the dishwasher and began to remove the dishes, thank god they are clean.
I am quickly realizing there is not a enough coffee in the world to get me through this day and why the hell did I choose now to try and quit smoking?

The Stupidity of Humans

Ok, I just had to post this because I can't stop being amazed by the complete stupidity of some people.  There is this couple that live in the building across from me.  They are a young couple, probably in their early 20's.  As most young adults they are probably ecstatic that they even own a vehicle of their own but when vehicles break down or something goes wrong, the general consensus is to have it fixed right?  Well not these two.  They own an older model Ford Explorer and the SUV doesn't go in reverse.  So each morning (or whenever they have to go somewhere) they have to push it out of their parking stall.  Wouldn't seem so bad except that we have a good accumulation of snow at the moment so pushing a vehicle is not easy.  Just a few minutes ago I watched, trying not to laugh, at 4 people trying to push this truck out of their parking stall.  They couldn't do it so another neighbour came to help and finally they got it out a bit.  Still not really enough room to be able to go forward.  But as luck would have it, one of the people helping them just had to move their own vehicle so that the truck could easily be driven forward and out.

The real kicker here is that this kid works for a car dealership.  Surely he could get someone there to fix his truck for a reasonable price.  Good grief!  The trouble some people put themselves through just to save a little money.

I wanted to take a picture to post but thought it would be kind of rude to do so while they were struggling so much.  What is that saying...one man's grief is another man's joy...or something like that?  So I have to be content with just telling you about it.

I've Had An Epiphany

Epiphany: A divine manifestation; the twelve days after Christmas that commemorates the three wise men visiting Jesus.

Don't I feel like a schlub. 
You may recall my post of January 3 about wanting to take down the Christmas tree NOW but hubby wanting to wait until January 6.  With it being some made up 'tradition' or whatever.  Well d'uh...of course it's a tradition...and it's a tradition across much of Canada too, not just Holland as I originallly suggested.  Hell this is common across a lot of the world.  The twelve days following Christmas ARE the twelve days of Christmas that the song refers to. So for many catholics and christians alike, it is common practice to leave your tree up for those twelve days and to even have a feast or celebration on Epiphany.  The twelfth day of Christmas.

The stupid thing is, I knew this...and I guess in my rage or frustration didn't see it.  It took a lady yesterday commenting that her Christmas wasn't over yet, not until January 6 for it was Epiphany.

I have never practiced this celebration...frankly, for me, once the New Year is here, it's back to business as usual.  I really have never paid any notice as to when we have taken down the tree.  I knew it was always after New Year but was it after the 6th?  Surely I have never had an epiphany feast.

Maybe that is a new tradition I should start in our little family.

(Oops...must go.  Julianne has Cheerios on her chin and on the floor, and there goes everything else onto the floor.   Wait...little girl...mommy's coming.)

Here Kitty, Kitty

I hate the days that I can't think of anything to write but due to making an obligation to myself to blog everyday, I am forced to get something down on the page.
I am at such a loss in fact, that I have decided that I am going to post one of my short stories that I submitted recently for a contest.  It didn't win but I got some great feedback on it from the judges.  It's better than nothing.

Didn't I Tell You NOT To Do That?

Why don't they listen?  We know better than they do, we have more experience and afterall we only want what's best for our children and we do know what's best.  Ha!  Don't they understand that running around with a knife is not a good idea, opening and touching a hot over rack, not recommended?  Using mommy's stool to reach the cupcakes on the counter after I said no.  Don't play with the christmas tree decorations.

One Of Many Firsts in 2010

With a fresh snowfall and the temperatures warming to a balmy -10 degrees C, it was finally time to take Julianne out to play in the snow.  Bundled up snug and warm in her snowsuit, she went out with her sled in tow, ready for a little ride.  This turned out to be short lived.  Now that she can walk she doesn't like to stay anywhere that she can't move for very long.  She climbed easily out of the sled on her own and proceeded to walk in the snow.  This is a shot of her finding a nice snow pile to play in.

Happy New Year!

First of all, let me apologize for the apparent hijacking of my blog by a suicide bombing puppet.  Don't know how he made it past security.  Note to self: Higher security screening necessary.

Just like the anticipated arrival of the Olympic flame, 2010 is finally here.  Took her long enough. 

Happy New Year...In-fi-dellllls!

2009 Comes to a Close

All afternoon has been spent chasing around a rambunctious 16 month old that now really does get into everything.  I thought it was bad before with just the climbing on furniture, tables, getting at my computer, pulling out all the shoes etc.  But lately she has learned how to open the dishwasher.  We try to keep it latched as that would seem the obvious solution, but the little smartie pants has figured out how to unlock it.  Then today, holy shit, the oven door. 

What's Your Motivation?

Motivation:
An emotion, desire, physiological need, or similar impulse that acts as an incitement to action.

The word motive produces images of serial killers, rapists, a general picture of all things criminal.  For criminals have motives for the bad things they do.  They were abused by a mother figure, have a total disrespect for women and want them all to suffer, or have some superiority complex...or maybe they are just really broke so they rob a 7-Eleven for the quick cash, or really thirsty so they hold up a liquor store, (although they could have bought the liquor with the money they stole from the 7-Eleven). 
We always hear the word motive in this context so it's no wonder when we think of someone having a motive for the things they do, it instills negative images. 

Treasure the Goodness in Every Moment

There is good to be found in everything we do or everything that happens to us.  Even when it seems hopeless there has to be something good.

The snot drizzles from her little nose and I hear her snoring at night.  If only she would take that stupid soother out of her mouth she might be able to breathe better but each time I try she wakes.  At least the loose snot means she's getting better right?  With every swipe of the tissue that is just a little less snot to capture.  We have been pretty lucky though...she is rarely sick and it's been months since I have had to chase after her with the tissue to collect the slimy mess.

The Brain of a Man ("simple" yet lovable)

I love my husband to death but sometimes he seriously drives me crazy.  It's not his fault.  He can't help it that he is full of testosterone and whatever other hormones make up the human male, making him the way he is.  I think there is some kind of chemical in a man's brain that makes them either lazy or stupid. 

Most Memorable Moments of 2009

I thought I would create my own memorable moments list of things that happened in 2009.  Not that my life is all that exciting but there has to be some things that top the charts.  It's nice to see what you can remember from the last year or what you forget.

January:

• I think it was pretty cold this month.  Really not remembering anything exciting or interesting that happened to us or anything that we might have done. 
• Julianne might have rolled over this month.  I can't remember for sure when that happened.

Christmas #2

Now the second Christmas that the little one has experienced, this is a huge difference from last year.  Still a babe wrapped in swaddling clothing last year, this time she was able to attempt unwrapping her own gifts.
For the most part, Julianne would open one and play with that, not even thinking about all the others that were left.  And there were a lot for her.  After all, it's all about the kids right? 

Many gifts we still had to help her with but by the time she was done, she was getting right into it, so started to open the ones that weren't for her.  Almost completely opened one of her Uncle Tim's gifts.  There was very little paper left on it by the time he arrived to open it himself. 

All in all, it was a good day.  A good experience, memory, for the record books.  Too bad Julianne won't remember it, but there will many more to come that she will remember.

So tired, can't even muster the energy to write anything of length.  Nothing more than the day was great.  Will write more tomorrow.

Hope you all had a great day and got lots of turkey.

Cheers

BTW---Fudge was good but WAAAAAY too sweet.  Will have to modify recipe to see if it can be made a little less sweet.  Also, extra note, wax paper sucks.  Use margerine or butter to grease pan. 

Full of Sugary Goodness

I did it.  For the first time in my life I made fudge.  Ha.  Not that it's a great accomplishment or anything cause it's really not all that hard to do.  Don't even have to turn on the oven.  But do have to turn on stove and that could be dangerous. 
It remains to be seen how it will turn out.  It's now sitting nestled in the fridge, going through the cooling stage.  T- 3 hours. 
When I was a kid, at Christmas my grandpa would often make fudge and it had to be the best thing

Holy Moly...2 more sleeps

Only two more sleeps until the big day.  No more sleeps if I don't sleep for the next couple of days.  Highly unlikely though as I have been incredibly tired the last week.  Perhaps unusually tired considering my normal sleeping pattern.  Could be the festive season is taking its toll on me or it could be that because I normally don't sleep all that well that it's finally caught up with me.  Whatever the reason, I know it will be two more sleeps before Christmas Day.

3 More Sleeps...

And I still don't have all my shopping done yet.  Sheesh.  So much for having everything done by the end of November.  But I will pull myself up and go to get the last couple of things soon.  Hopefully today.  Plus I still have to do the dinner shopping.  My plan was to do that tomorrow but I might do it today.  We will see.  It's starting to snow AGAIN.  It snowed all day yesterday.  Looks like we are going to have that white Christmas afterall.

I have more to say today but not enough time to write so I will post again later maybe.  Or leave you all in suspense. 

Cheers

Monday Again?

Is it really Monday again?  Already?  Where does the time go?  Well it's the start of a new week and hopefully a better week.  So far, Julianne is in a good mood.  She slept really good.  Actually she has been sleeping pretty good for the last few days.  She went down around 8pm last night and didn't wake up until close to 10am this morning so I would say that's a success.  She didn't eat much for breakfast though.  Sometimes the amount she eats worries me but she seems to be doing just fine.  Obviously she is getting enough.  Just eats like a bird.  And she eats often so I am sure she's just fine. 
I think she's getting used to not having a soother during the day.  Now it's just a matter of getting it away from her at night.  I tried to go take it away from her the other night while she was sleeping, but as soon as I pulled it out of her mouth she sat straight up in bed.  Not entirely awake but enough to know what I was doing I think.  So I gave it back to her and left it alone.  I think I might have to go the route of poking the little pinholes in it.  Although it's not entirely necessary that I take it away from her now.  I will probably leave it for a few more days.  Maybe in January I will progress to the next step.

So the staff Christmas party is complete and it wasn't all that bad.  The food was good and there was lots to talk about.  Namely the 50 something Janis Joplin-prostitute wannabe.  What the (*$^)!  Who dresses like that?  Long jet black hair parted straight down the middle and wild enough that many a bird could have found a safe haven among the mattes.  You couldn't even see her face behind all that hair.  And that was nothing compared to what she was wearing!  Black, bell bottomed strappy dress that was at least 2 sizes too small.  Her breasts were so squashed into that dress I swear she was trying to perform a self-mammogram.  I felt sorry for the little duo as they tried to break free, trying to catch any possible breath they could.  It was so short in the back that her bra was ALL you could see.  And of course the dress was WAY too short.  I couldn't tell you what kind of shoes she was wearing as I was too shocked with the rest of the getup.  Rumour has it she's trying to find herself a 'decent' man but come on lady, do you really think that is going to attract the kind of man you're wishing for?  Good grief!  Some people will never get it.  From the looks of it, what you're offering, most men have to pay for.
Sorry, I don't normally talk about people like this but it was definitely a sight that I just couldn't get over. 
However, the highlight of the night was the awards.  Employee of the Year went to none other than....wait for it...drumroll please....my husband. Well deserved for sure.  And the nice monetary bonus that came with the glory was appreciated.  So I guess this was one party that wasn't all that bad.
One thing that really gets to me though, are the people that show such a lack of respect for the company they work for that they show up looking like they just rolled out of bed.  Most of these people were young men though.  Not that that's any excuse but it explains a lot.  You could at least not look like a hoodlum.  There were some I swear must have been packing something under that hoody.  It's possible that it's not a blatant disrespect for the company per se but a lack of respect for themselves.  But that's a totally different issue.

Cheers.

6 more sleeps til Christmas.  The stockings are hung by the chimney with care...in hopes that someone will fill the fuzzy things.  Most of the shopping is done, just a couple more things to get and then of course all the fixings for our holiday dinner.  Then we are ready to go.
Julianne is happy the last couple of days.  Probably because Daddy is home but happy nonetheless.  I'll take it, no matter what the reason.
Arie's staff Christmas party is tonight.  Julianne is spending time with her Auntie so that we can go out and have a good time, kid free.  It will be a welcomed break.  Even though, staff Christmas parties are not my favourite thing to do.  The formalities that surround them can be so boring and then the fact that I don't know anyone at this particular one.  But personally I don't like my own staff parties either.  At least the ones of the past.  The best ones have been the informal parties, at a co-workers home where it is simply the old fashioned house party.  Now those are the good ones.  Drinks, food, laughs and no formal activities.  Oh I miss those days.

Until tomorrow.

Soothers Are For Babies

Julianne will be 16 months old on Christmas Day.  I did some research into the right time to discontinue her soother.  Or binky or whatever you may call it.  I call it a soother for that is what it is, or pacifier but that sounds too stuffy, like I am a super sophisticated woman living the high life.  Ha, whatever.  It's a soother to me.

Different articles recommended different times and different ways of doing it.  But the general concensus was that I could start anytime.  If it doesn't work now, try again later.  I kinda wanted to have it done before we begin to potty train her.

To wean off the bottle was pretty simple.  We just reduced her bottle to night time, just before bed and enforced the cup more regularly.  One day she seemed to decide on her own that she didn't want that night time bottle anymore.  So that was fine with me.  So I am hoping the same will happen with the soother.

We have reduced the soother to naptime and bedtime.  Soon I am going to start taking it away from her in the middle of the night or middle of naptime so she doesn't have it when she wakes up and see how that goes (although most of the time the soother is on the floor by morning so she doesn't have it anyways).

Now, there could be some connection between the elimination of the daytime soother and her "episodes".  So, if that's the case, it should pass.  But we had her in the car this evening to go shopping and on the way there and way back she didn't have it and we had no problems.  Usually by the time we are done shopping and driving home she is incredibly cranky and today she was oddly calm.  Coincidence, probably.

There are so many other suggestions out there on how to wean your child.  Some really good suggestions and some really cruel suggestions.  Like just taking it away and letting her suffer.  I don't think I could so that.  Not only is it painful to her to go cold turkey, it would be painful to us.  I imagine moreso that it has been.  I don't want to traumatize the poor kid.  I suppose it works for some, but I am not going there.
The other idea I really liked was to poke holes in the nipple end so that it deflates when she sucks on it.  Do this for a few days then cut the tip off so it's even worse.  As days pass, if she hasn't already given it up on her own, continue to remove small portions of the nipple until it's down to pretty much nothing.  The idea is that your child will give it up on their own.  I like the gradual aspect to this method and that the child is essentially making the decision to give it up.  Seems fair and allows the child to feel a little more grown  up and in control.

For now I will try this way and see what happens.  If it's like the bottle, then it won't be long.

Then comes potty time. 

Cheers.

A Picture Worth A Thousand Words

One of the most beautiful pictures I have seen in a long time!  Just wanted to share.

Resolutions...

I fear it's that time of year again where we vow to make New Year's resolutions only to fail miserably within the first week (or month for the truly dedicated) of the new year.

I gave up making resolutions as I admit I am one that usually barely makes the first week.  I prefer to set goals.  But not year long goals, just goals to be completed at my leisure.  Ok that's kind of defeating the purpose because in my set up there is no chance of failure unless I die too soon.  But then I am not around to know that I failed and feel guilty about it.  My loved ones could go on thinking, 'It's so sad, she didn't complete all the goals she set for herself.'  But they would get over it.  Of that I am sure.  Because really isn't about living each day of your life to the absolute fullest?  Maybe you would rather spend some much needed quality time with your family rather than go to the gym and work off that 25lbs you vowed to shed.  You just never know when your time is up.  Do the things you love and love the things you do.

There is nothing wrong though with setting a few personal goals.  I do it all the time.  Mostly with my writing but maybe it's time to set some goals for my life.

Stay tuned.

Stay Strong and Stay Calm

I think I finally have it figured out.  Julianne has not been going to bed very nicely for about the past week.  Well, she'll go to bed and lay there playing and talking to her animals for over an hour then gradually the talking turns into moaning or squealing, eventually turning into an all out scream, pretty much a temper tantrum.  Speaking of temper tantrums, I will get to that shortly.  Keep reading!

So normally when the crying begins we would get up and get her, give her a snack and put her back to bed and it worked like a charm.  Lately though, that has not been working. 

Due to some other recent events with her, I have come to realize she is just having a fit because she is not getting her own way.  So one night, we got her up but afterwards she wouldn't go back to bed.  I got fed up as I am sure most parents do and finally just left her in bed and let her cry it out.  Approximately 20 minutes later she was asleep.  Good, problem solved.  Well then the other night it did not work out so easily.  She screamed, after being in her bed for about an hour.  Finally catching on to what she was trying to do, this time I refused to take her out of bed.  I went and talked to her, which didn't work.  I tried sitting in the middle of the floor with my back to her (saw that on SuperNanny, but I think its actuallly meant for the child that won't stay in their REAL bed) and some light music which actually worked for awhile but of course as soon as I moved it started all again.  So finally I gave her a little snack, which she played with rather than eating it.  So I gave her a drink of water and voila! she layed down and went right to sleep. 

However, tonight I was not interested in dealing with the temperment problems or whatever you want to call it.  Soooo...she did not get a nap today.  She was tired earlier in the day and I did try and give her a nap but she wasn't interested in sleeping so I kept her up and no matter how tired I could tell she was getting, I didn't put her to bed until after supper.  And she went to sleep with NO problems whatsoever.  Yes she went down a little earlier than normal but if it means I get that much needed couple of hours of peace and quiet in the evening then so be it.  That's what I am going to do.

Now for the temper tantrums.  I think more fitting is Julianne's episodes.  She throws a fit if she does not get her own way.  Like if we don't let her climb on the kitchen table and play with Mommy's laptop.  Or after she has gone through so much trouble to remove that particular piece of garbage from the trash can, how dare we take it away from her.  Sometimes there is advanced warning...big pouty lip comes out followed by the tears, or we just get straight screaming and laying on the floor kicking and rolling and hitting if you dare to get too close to her.  What a treat! 

I had my first experience of an "episode" in public.  We were at the mall trying to get some Christmas shopping done and this time she wanted to walk by herself.  I should mention we got one of those kiddy harnesses for her so she could walk and we could hold on to her, but once she was in a big wide open space with so much room to run but held back by the harness, that was it, she wouldn't go anywhere except down on the floor.  And yet I remained calm.  I simply picked her up, carried to another store that actually had shopping carts and then it was all good.  That was until I wouldn't let her touch everything that we walked past. 

I did make it home, a little exhausted but unscathed for the most part.  I am hoping that this was just a matter of being hungry and tired but only time will tell.  Until then I am on a mission to do everything possible to break her of this early.  Namely just not giving in.  I have to stand my ground, after all, I am a lot taller than she is.  For now at least! 

Cheers!

The kids are sleeping and I am sitting her mostly alone, trying to decide what to write about today.  The Christmas tree lights shine and the coloured lights around the room give it a soft colourful glow.  I was thinking about writing about the true meaning of Christmas, but there are so many different opinions out there that it seemed misguided to only write about what I believe, what I have been raised to believe, and the beliefs I have adopted on my own. 
The only constant around Christmas is the spirit of giving to those less fortunate.  I actually did something the other day that I have never done.  I gave money to the Salvation Army.  I was in the grocery store and a man was standing by his red bucket. jingling his bells, and it just made  me think.  I strongly support the veterans on Remembrance Day but at Christmas I sometimes forget about those people out there less fortunate.  I am not well off by any means, but I have a roof over my head, food in the fridge, warm clothes to wear, and extra money to do some fun things.  My daughter has just about everything she needs, actually probably more than she needs and there are people out there that don't have any of the above mentioned items that we often take for granted.  So, I decided it was my time to give a little more.  I think about it every year but very often just don't take action.  When the weather gets really cold here, and it does get really cold, I think about the poor homeless people out there and how difficult it must be for them in these temperatures.  I want to do something but it seems overwhelming.  There are so many people that need help, where do you start, how do you decide who is more deserving? 
Last year I was going to donate some blankets and warm clothes to the homeless shelters but then I got to thinking, only about 1000 homeless people make it into the shelters each night, (that number may be off, it's probably even less) so what about the other 1000 that are huddled under stairs in back alleys, under bridges, in parks among the trees, with barely anything to cover them, trying desperately to stay out of the frigid cold.  I could not imagine a life like that and I am sure the vast majority of us couldn't either but the fact remains that it's out there whether we choose to acknowledge it or not. 
So I did my little bit and hope others will too.  In the spirit of Christmas.

Take the Gobble, Gobble Out of Christmas?

Arie wants roast beef for Christmas dinner.  Are you kidding me?  Christmas is time for turkey and stuffing and all the other great foods that go with the holidays, and he wants to go for something else.  It's total crazy talk. 
His argument is that it is so much work.  But for who?  Surely not for him.  And really how much work is it?  You make the stuffing, fill the birds butt and neck and toss it in the oven.  The oven does all the work. 
I have a solution though...if he's concerned about it being too much work for ME, guess what, he's gonna help me this year.  He doesn't know it yet but he will find out soon enough.  In roughly 240 hours, give or take a few hours.
Won't he be surprised. 

MERRY CHRISTMAS, or HAPPY HOLIDAYS, whichever you prefer.

I would have thought that the days of late or no showers would be gone.  You hear stories about mothers that just don't have the time to get cleaned up but I thought that was only with newborns or within the first year.  I was sadly mistaken.  As it turns out, the early days are much easier.  You can just put the baby in a bassinette or playpen and off you go, no worries of the little one escaping and you keep them just outside the bathroom door and you can still hear everything.  But as they grow older not only can they get into things when you're not around, and very quickly, but if you try to bring them in the bathroom with you, they try to climb in.  Actually the one time I tried this, months ago, Julianne kept pulling the shower curtain out of the bathtub, so not only was she soaked by the time I was done, so was the bathroom.  I will add, there are much easier ways to clean the bathroom.
So now, she is 15 months old and if I want the luxury of bathing I have to wait until she goes down for a nap, or get up way before she wakes up.  The problem there is that they are so unpredictable.  You never know when they will actually wake up or as of late, not take a daytime nap at all.  She doesn't like the playpen anymore so that has been out of the picture for quite so time.  It leaves me only with spongebaths, and I don't own a sponge.  So I must wait until Daddy gets home.  Ugh!  There has to be another way. 

So this is Sunday again.  It's a cold and blustery day, and when I say cold I really mean cold.  -28 to be exact and it's not looking any better for tomorrow.  There is some reprieve this week though.  By Wednesday we are supposed to be in the positive digits.
So cramped inside.  Julianne is cranky today.  Mostly because she can't do whatever she wants.  It's temper tantrum crankiness.  She was fine for most of the morning but she has learned how to climb on all of the furniture.  Her new favourite is the kitchen chairs.  But then she wants to climb on the kitchen table and we stop her and she gets mad.  Then I wouldn't let her have the camera and she got mad.  Even started throwing things.  So guess where she is now?  HA, mama wins again. Bed!  She's not complaining about that though so maybe she was just getting tired. 
I know I was.

The Phone Keeps Ringing

I am so tired of telemarketers and telephone surveys.  It's gotten to the point that if I don't recognize the phone number I won't answer the phone.  Or if it's an 800, 877 or 888 number, don't expect the phone to be answered. 
For the last week, I have been getting this one phone caller that always comes up as a Private Caller.  That's annoying too because I have some friends that come up as private caller, so do you answer or not.  The choice of late has been not.  If it's someone I know, they will leave a message.  If it's an important call, they will leave a message.  Well this one particular caller was not leaving a message and I was continually ignore it.  Then they started calling at ALL hours.  First mostly in the evening, then in the mid afternoon and then finally it started in the morning.  Give me a break.  You would think if the phone is not answered after a few days of calling these people would give up and move on to the next victim.  But no, they are persistant.

So last night after they had called three times yesterday, I finally gave in and answered the phone.  I have a hard time hanging up on people and I have a hard time telling people I am not interested in what they are selling, or for them not to call me anymore.  Hence the reason for just not answering.  But alas, I gave in because I wanted the calls to stop.

Lucky for me they weren't selling anything, it was just a survey.  Fine I don't mind the surveys, as long as they aren't dreadfully long.
So mystery caller has been identified.  Let's see how long it takes for the next one to get that persistant.

Daddy's Girl

It's too early for me to be awake.  Well, not in normal person standards but it doesn't help that Julianne decided it was a good idea to stay up until after midnight.  Everytime we tried to put her to bed, she cried.  Everytime Arie tried to go to bed himself as he had to get up early for work, she cried.  But if she was with him, she was fine.  She even followed him around like a lost puppy and then when he wasn't in sight, she cried.  I seriously think this is taking Daddy's Girl to a whole new level.  Certainly she seems to favour him more than me and I am ok with that because I still get my fair amount of attention from her but this is going to a whole new level.  While Arie is flattered (and irritated for still being awake at 12:30 in the morning) I am a little insulted, (but not that much).  More irritated too for still being up at 12:30 and not having been able to have my relaxing few hours before bed.  So much for evening television.  The one thing that I look forward too after she has gone to bed, a couple of hours of just sitting and not having to think.  But apparently she had other plans for us.  Thankfully she is still sleeping but it won't be for much longer.  I heard her making noice already and soon the guy is coming to install this new electric fireplace.  Apparently they don't fit in the fireplaces all that well so he is going to have to be cutting portions of the old fireplace to make it fit.  It's going to be such a joy.  And of course, once again it is snowing and cold.  If it warms up to something semi-reasonable I will take Julianne out to play in the snow, but we can't (or rather, I won't) drive on these streets with her in the car unless I absolutely have to.  But a little snow fun might be in order.  It's currently -12 with a windchill of -20. 
Did I mention how much I hate winter?

How is there enough meat in a short story to make a make movie out of it?  Apparently it can be done.  Examples: The Shawshank Redemption based on the short story, Rita Hayworth and Shawshank Redemption by Stephen King.  Alright, not a great example as it was a novella so somewhat longer than the average short story.
Then there is Brokeback Mountain, based on the short story of the same name by Annie Proulx. 
There are probably a lot more out there but I don't have time to look for them. 
It's just interesting what screenwriters can do with something fairly small.  I haven't actually read the above mentioned short stories but it is going to be a mission of mine to actually check them out. 

Later...

Not quite sure what to write about today.  Nothing new and exciting has developed in our lovely household.  It's warmer today than it has been in a few days.  A balmy -15.  I think it's time to break out the summer clothes.  Funny how we get so climatized.  When it's -20 for awhile, suddenly -1 is incredibly warm but when we have experienced +20 for several days, +5 feels cold.  Our bodies are strange that way.  But either way you cut it, I hate being cold.  I would rather be sweating from the heat than shivering from the cold.  Give me +30 temperatures everyday and I am happy.  Ok maybe that's a little much but between +20-+25 would be ideal.  I think I need to move south.  Really far south.

Our landlord is taking out our wood burning fireplaces and installing electric ones.  Not sure what I think about that.  I like the wood burning but at the same time I have been smelling smoke from other apartments quite frequently and it's nerve wracking when you aren't sure where it's coming from.  Just last night I could smell it and I thought it was coming from my computer because the only time I could smell it was when I was sitting in front of it.  I kept smelling the computer just to make sure but it was fine and it wasn't even warm. Had to be coming from somewhere else.  So maybe this change will be a good thing.  Although if it's used, the electric bill will go up.  Wood is cheaper but more dangerous.  On the other hand, Julianne won't be able to get into the fireplace anymore so that is a blessing, although she has been pretty good about that lately.  Her latest thing has been to unplug the christmas lights and then try to plug them in again.  I am not really ok with that.  But I know eventually she will get over it.  Just not sure when that will be.

And she can climb up on the kitchen chairs now to sit at the table.  The only problem with that is that it's where my laptop is and that's the only reason she wants to climb up there.  Then when we don't let her, she gets angry and throws a little temper tantrum.  I fear she is going to be one of those.  Those children you see in the department stores that throw a fit when they don't get what they want.  Not looking forward to that.  But one baby step at a time.  With all the negative things that are still to come, I know there are going to be a lot of good times to come as well.  Funny how we only think about the bad things though.  I guess cause we can't predict the good, but the bad is inevitable.

Well enough of that.  Gotta go take a shower since the little one is down for a nap.  Oh the peace and quiet.  Enjoy it while it lasts.

Monday Quibbles

It's Monday again.  Yes people, it comes around continuously, whether we want it to or not, every seven days in fact.  For most it's the dreaded beginning of the work week, for some it's not.  Those are the lucky people that work from home so everyday is a work day for them.  Unless of course you have a set schedule and give yourself regular days off.  Or you could work from home and do absolutely nothing even though you're supposed to but instead you leave it all to the very last possible minute and still get it done and no one is the wiser, except you of course.
I  must admit lately, I fall into that last category.  There is a long list of things I should have gotten done at home but the weather has somehow left me uninspired.  I look outside and just the thought of how cold it is outside, for some reason just makes me want to curl up under a blanket with a good book and wait until it blows over.  Even though it is nice and toasty warm inside, Julianne is napping and I have all the time in the world to get a lot done.  In between loads of laundry.  In between cleaning the house, collecting scattered toys and putting them in one spot even though I know that later they will be scattered everywhere again. 
The dishes are washing, there are only a few to do by hand and really that's it.  And of course I sit here in front of my computer blogging about all the things I should be doing, and precious time is slipping away.  Julianne will only sleep for so long, I should be taking advantage of the quiet time but at the same time, when she is asleep I should be taking advantage of the chance to get some much needed housework done. 
There never seems to be enough time.  If only we could add just a few more hours to the day, I could get so much more done.  More housework, more Facebook, more time with my daughter and husband.  I have the feeling I still wouldn't have the time to get the actual paying work done. 
Priorities? 

Not a Toddler, A Monkey

She climbs and I mean she climbs on anything and everything.  Recently Julianne learned how to climb up onto the couch and sit like the average person.  Then she discovered she could climb onto the back of the couch which terrifies me as it's a pretty long fall to the ground below.  So then, not sure if it's to test my patience, or my blood pressure, she decides she is going to climb on the end table.  Nothing on the table as has been the case for as long as we have had a toddler but she found this nice little perch and goes there regularly.  Right in the middle of the table and oh so proud she is.  She sits nice and knows how to get off of it and back onto the couch but I guess the question is, is it ok to let her continue to do this?  Will she grow out of it?  My initial response would be yes but are we setting ourselves up for other problems if we let her do as she pleases now?  Of course we don't let her do EVERYTHING she wants.  Just the stuff that seems innocent enough and no one is getting hurt.  At least not yet.  If we hadn't let her take a few tumbles off the couch I suppose she never would have learned how to get down properly, climb up properly or even sit nice like everyone else.  Chances need to be taken, I know that.  We can't be overprotective about everything.  And there comes a time when it's really more energy than it's worth to prevent her from doing certain things. 

As promised, here is a picture of our Christmas tree. I took a few others but for some reason, everytime I try to take a picture of the tree with all the lights lit up, the image goes blurry.  Like trying to capture the image of a ghost...that just does not want to be caught.    This was the best that came out and it's not all that bad.

I love Christmas!

Oh Christmas Tree!

We finally did it!  The Christmas tree is up and the house is decorated.  It had to be the cutest experience ever with little Julianne and her first tree decorating party.  She watched so carefully as I started to put the decorations on the tree and then she decided she wanted to help.  First she started out just handing me the decorations but soon realized she could do it herself.  She took several of the decorations and laid them ever so nicely IN the tree so that they rested precariously on the branches.  Of course she couldn't actually get the strings over the ends of the limbs in order for them to dangle nicely.  But she was so proud of herself.
Surprisingly after the tree was decorated and lit, she has hardly tried to touch it.  I thought this would be a lot more difficult but the few times that she did try to steal the balls off the tree, we told her no and she left them alone.  Today, at least as long as I have been up, she has not tried to touch the tree at all.

We wanted to take her out to play in the snow today but it's a little too cold.  Currently -8 but very windy.  I am not sure what the windchill is at the moment but it is definately too cold to take her out to play.  If it wasn't so windy we would bundle her up and take her out.  Besides, I think she is starting to get a little cold.  It's not too bad yet but she has been sneezing and last night had a pretty runny nose.  Of course she had been crying so it's hard to tell if the runny nose was because of that or if it was because of an oncoming cold.  I guess only time will tell.  She seems happy enough and is eating properly so there may be nothing to worry about.

As soon as the camera is recharged I will add some pictures of the pretty tree.

I know I said I wouldn't but I couldn't resist.   Besides, I don't have much else to write about.  A winter storm is blowing across our lovely city with a wonderful arctic front on its tale.  Thankfully we aren't going to plummet to those -20 degree temperatures but it's going to get close. 
Big snowflakes are falling but when the wind picks up they all blend together and create an almost white out condition.  It's not cold right now, unless you're foolish enough to stand in the path of the wind but it's coming. 
I think today is a good day to set up the Christmas tree and decorate the house for the festive season.  Need food first through.  Coffee in not going to cut it.  I need full fuel to get through that task.  Should be fun with little miss fingers getting into everything.  Her first Christmas where she will actually be able to move and open her own presents.  Sometimes I think I wish she was still confined to a bouncy chair and content with said bouncy chair.
Until later.

As promised, my loyal readers now get two posts from me in one day!  What is this world coming to?

I have no clues as to what to write about, nothing all that interesting happening on the home front and I refuse to write about our sub-zero temperatures. 

Julianne is eating lunch.  PB&J with bananas again.  And watching Big Comfy Couch on Treehouse.  She loves that show.  Giggles and giggles and giggles.  It's such a treat when she's that happy.  Don't get me wrong she is happy most of the time, but lately she has been having a few more cranky days than I am used to.  But I must brace myself because I know this is nothing compared to what she might be like in a few years. 

My Grandma might be making the trek over the Rocky Mountains to join us for Christmas.  She is alone now since Grandpa died almost 9 years ago and most of the rest of the family left Invermere to get on with their own lives.  Everytime I talk to her she seems so lonely, and she's almost 85 years old so we came up with a plan to get her over for Christmas.  She is excited about the possibility but could still change her mind before the time comes.  It would be nice to have her here.  I haven't spent a Christmas with her since I was about 13 years old.  Yes it's been that long.  Maybe even since I was 12.  That's a long time if you know how old I am now.  And she hasn't seen my brother in even longer.  Since he was about 4 or 5 if I were to hazard a guess.  He is now 26.  So you can imagine how that will be for both of them.

Well, Julianne is just about done with her lunch and the TV show will be over shortly so I must go prepare myself to be her entertainment.  Oh the joys of motherhood.  I get to be a kid again.  What could be better?

Technically it is December 3 already and since I am still awake, thanks to my precious daughter who now thinks it's a good idea to scream and scream until she gets her own way, I will write in my blog.  You know it's really is hard to stay dedicated to this thing.  I have to conciously think about it each and every day.  Unless of course I happen to have a fabulous topic to write about, then I am all over it, first thing, as soon as I can open my laptop.  Sometimes even, my fingers can't keep up with my brain and you will find missing words in sentences.  It's a game I like to play.  Fill in the blanks.  Ha

No not really.  But my brain does often get ahead of my fingers.  If only I could actually type as fast as I think.  That would be truly amazing.  But then sometimes my brain is super slow and then my fingers are too fast for it.  K, that doesn't really make sense, but whatever.  It is 12:14am and most normal people would be asleep by now.  But nope not me. Wide awake.

I did finally get the little one to sleep.  It took forcing her to cuddle with me in the dark until she fell asleep.  I have to admit I almost fell asleep too but then my neck started to get sore in the chair so figured it was time to get her to bed and then I had the full intention to I too going off to bed, but instead, after moving around I was suddenly awake and ready to go.  So of course, start checking email and all that wonderful stuff that beckons me to the computer, like an addict.  God it's pathetic.  I have to learn to say no to the computer.  I tried that this weekend actually and it went not too bad.  I had just had enough of it and needed a break.

But that was only one day and then suddenly it was the beginning of the week again and I was right back at it.  Mind you, I have been accomplishing quite a bit the last little while.  Getting more writing done than I have in a long time and keeping up with the blogging. 

Seriously I think I could go on all night.  I could sit here and just write and write everything that comes into my mind.  It would probably be rather entertaining but it would go on and on and on and on and I know my faithful readers out there actually have things to do with  their day.  Like work or something. 

So this is where I will cut it off and say good night.  Or good morning depending on where in the world you are, you might just be waking up from a wonderful deep sleep.  (You know who you are.)

Until later...literally...probably later this morning.  You lucky people might actually get two posts out of me today. 

I Did It!

Julianne's first intelligable words other than Mama or Dada.  I couldn't believe it.  Last night she woke in the middle of the night screaming.  Bad dream perhaps but I still find it hard to believe that a child under 2 can have nightmares.  What could they possibly have nightmares about?  But whatever.  The fact still remains that she woke up and she was not happy.  A blood curdling scream in fact.  But once she was up, she was fine.  Happy and wanted to play. 
She has just recently learned how to climb on the couch unassisted and last night was no exception.  She pulled herself up onto the couch, turned and sat properly, and proudly exclaimed, "I did it."  Arie and I were so surprised and pleased.  Of course my initial reaction was that it was a fluke.  But I repeated the 3 word phrase to her and she said it again.  It was absolutely one of the cutest things I have seen in a long time, another step in her already fast moving life.  She is growing up so fast, I can't keep up. 
I often sit and wonder what life will be like when she's 15.  In that dreadful teenage, coming of age, stage.  And I just hope that I can be there for her, or that she will let me be there for her, like I was last night.

Later.

PB & J

There are few things that take me back to my childhood but PB & J us surely on the top of the list.  For those of you not familiar with the old acronym, Peanut Butter & Jam.  The reality series Big Brother really brought it back to the foreground of people's thoughts but who could ever really forget this favourite treat.  Comfort food from the past, but only if you had a good childhood and the reminiscing brings back happy thoughts.

Yesterday I took Julianne on a playdate with a friend.  When we sat down for lunch I gave Julianne a tuna salad sandwich but her playdate friend got PB&J.  Julianne instantly proceeded to steal the food off of his plate and claimed it as her own.  Lesson learned:  Always give children the same food so they don't steal the other's food.  Thankfully he didn't seem to mind much, even though he is 3 years old and at that age that sharing might not be the happiest moment in his life.

So this afternoon, I have given Julianne a PB&J sandwich and she is still eating it in complete silence.  Very focused and cooperative.  Gotta love it when a plan comes together. (oooh another blast from the past, A-Team for those of you unfamiliar with 80's television.

Her lunch may be a little messy but if she's happy that's all that really matters.  Content and quiet.  These are the days you really treasure your children, when they're happy and not wearing on your every nerve.

Later...